Feeling forgotten can be one of the hardest things about struggling with our mental health. Forgotten by friends who no longer invite us to events because it feels so unlikely we’ll be able to say “yes”. Forgotten by brothers and sisters in Christ who no longer ask how we are because the answer always seems to be the same. Forgotten by a world whose social media feeds are so very different to our own. Forgotten by a system that doesn’t always have the capacity to offer us the help we need. Maybe even forgotten by God who never seems to answer our prayers in the ways we would like.
Feeling forgotten is deeply painful. There’s the isolation – the sense of being different – the experience of rejection that leaves us on the periphery of society. But it can also cut to the very core of our identity: What does it mean to be human? What does it mean to be me? Will I ever have the purpose, value, and connectedness that seems to come so naturally to those around?
A God who remembers
Scripture is clear – God remembers, he does not forget. He remembered Noah in the days of the flood, even though there was rebellion all around. He remembered his people enslaved in Israel, when Egyptian rule seemed unshakeable. He remembered Hannah in her childlessness and distress. He remembered his covenant to David when he was under threat. He remembered his chosen people when he sent his Messiah. Psalm 139 reminds us that we cannot go to the east or the west, the heights or the depths, to get away from God. For those of us in Christ, he sends his Spirit to indwell us – he could not be closer. He sees. He knows. He has not forsaken.
And, in his remembrance, he acts and brings hope. For Noah, there came the instructions for the ark. For Israel, he sent the plagues and the Passover. For Hannah, the unexpected blessing of a child. For David, rescue and the continuation of his line. For all, the blessing of a Saviour whose sacrifice brings an end to guilt, shame, and separation from God. His presence brings comfort, hope and sustaining power. He collects our tears in his bottle. He keeps his everlastings arms beneath us strong. He leads as the good Shepherd he is. He loves, with an unending love.
A God who helps us remember
In our struggles, it is easy to forget that he sees us – knows us – loves us. Those facts sometimes get buried under the pain. But one of the reasons he gave us his Spirit in the first place was to help us remember (John 14:26). He is at work in us, enabling us to remember his tender and strong salvation. When we doubt his love and care, the Spirit points us to the cross and whispers: “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!” As we struggle with our purpose and value, he nudges us and says, “For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight”. As we lose sight of hope, he says boldly, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you”. We can’t guarantee healing in this life – he never promises us ease, he doesn’t promise to give us what we want – but he is leading us on a life of increasing intimacy and trust. It’s a journey that builds our faith, little by little, and shows us more of him.
If you’re in any doubt, yes – that does include you. Even by enabling you to read this simple blog post, with its many flaws, the Lord is drawing your attention to just how adored you are. Maybe you could intentionally extend your remembrance in some way – reading a Psalm, a gospel snippet and consciously noting how much the Lord is loving and sustaining you today. Spend a moment in lament that also expresses trust. There is so much to remember. You’re not useless. You’re not pointless. You’re not forgotten. His gaze is upon you – and his eyes are full of kindness and love.
A God who calls us to remember each other
God doesn’t need our help in this work of remembering, but it is a privilege to follow his lead. Being like Christ is the highest calling any of us can have and part of that involves remembering those who are brought low by the pain of this fallen world. Jesus remembered the sick, the outcast, the struggling. He moved towards those in great need and brought hope. In our finite and limited ways, we in the church are called to do the same. It is worth asking ourselves the question, how can we show that we remember those who are struggling this week? How can we help them remember God’s love for them too?
It might be as simple as a text message to someone struggling, showing what you are praying for them today. Or a Bible verse to that person who is limping, that reminds them of God’s deep love and care. It might be an invitation to coffee or the provision of a meal. It could be a short walk in the beautiful sunshine or an invitation to join in a family barbecue. Or the provision of a lift to the GP. Maybe it could be the offer to pray together on the phone for 10 minutes each week (nothing longer, nothing that is going to feel untenable after a little while) or the opportunity to read a Psalm together in a coffee shop once a month. Can you remember someone in your congregation this week? Can you send some flowers with a hand-written note, reminding them of the Lord’s provision? Can you pray on Sunday for all in the congregation to know they have hope – because they are seen?
There are moments when we all feel forgotten, and those are moments of great pain, but we have a God who sees. Let’s be signposts to his remembering today – and in the process bring immeasurable hope.
